because you are never here

tum aaj nahi aaaogi,
aur ye shab-e-hizr me jalti hui shaama maddham nahi hogi,
in aankhon me jalte rahenge,
naummidi ke diye,
aur fir se satayegi humein tumhaari yaad…
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for i will ever wonder,
what if you decided to come back,
what if you decided to be mine..
what then?
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fir se main tarshunga,unhi pattharon pe,
ummeed ki taseevrein,
fir se zindagi me aageyi,
wohi nazuk si [...]

a poem i cannot complete…

often have i told myself the words,
sometimes registering them,sometimes not..
saying to myself,these flowers have withered,
and a new season should arrive now.
but how to forget,and to shuffle on,
with painful thighs and a heavy heart,
can i really move ahead?how to think clearly-
what are my reasons?and do i want to?
these days it rains everyday,at dawn-
and smoke i allow [...]

waiting,waiting….

some paths diverge from my room,
predictable,shifty,clammy paths,
frustrating,routine,pompously arrogant-
these paths lead me astray,
and make me lost..
into a jungle of consciousness..
wide awake i dream of freedom,
the ability to have a choice-no i have it,
i just cant exercise my choice!
and so i walk on,trudging,slow steps,one after the other,
on these widely narrow paths,
that lead from small towns to mammoth [...]

stranger to this city

all this is new,
and yet,why do i feel,
that i have written these lines before,
been to this place,
haunted the same areas,
and relaxed with the same trees..
when i am stranger to this town.
why does this feeling pervade me,
a new oldness…
or is it an old newness?
whats the difference between the two?
perhaps its my aloneness,
a crazy claustrophobically crowded loneliness,
where [...]