colours of life

Posted on | March 22, 2008 | 1 Comment

you are not around,
and the world is splashed with colours,
bright green,brilliant pink,and sunshine yellow,
different hues,for different flowers,
and the odour of spring is in the air,
even the drying tree is sprouting new leaves,
and you are not around with me,
to love me,as the world soaks in love,
i,at last, seek out people,
searching,looking for you in other people,
with their smiles,half smiles,nods,winks,
and twinkles of the eyes,
dimples formed in smiles,delicate touches,
and some harmless words spoken to bridge the distances,
glows of affection, and the warmth of new familiarity,
i seek to fill the gap left by you,
with other people..reaching out to them,
trying to bridge distances..
but even they walk away,
leaving me lonely, alone at insufferable midnight,
and i go sit at the terrace again,
seeking solace from the stars,
but the wind blows strong and cold,
touching me,running its hands over my cheek,lips,eyes,
through the hair,
deceptively gentle in touch,
as it viciously mocks my loneliness,
even as,ever angry in its more infinite loneliness,
it blows leaves away from trees,
plays with empty plastic glasses on the road,
and lifts thrown away pieces of paper,
and throws them angrily against the walls,trees and passersby,
whining angrily, trying to scare me so i will not notice its own loneliness,
but i dont care,
without you..i am insensate,
and all my efforts at survival,mere failures,
i had a place in your life..
and you went,and the world has stopped there,
i dont have a place in it anymore,
people i touch-walk away..
and the world may be bright and colourful,
but i am just numb now,
and tired of trying..
and they do not understand.
without you, all the colours of the world are colourless,
and people want to stay just persons,
and without you..
i can only survive inside my walls,
playing smoke and mirrors with myself,
fencing and barricading my soul and heart,
i can live.
but without you..
the world is only drab
because you would not have walked away,
like everyone else, leaving me
facing this insufferable midnight,
and the taunting wind and mocking stars..
no.

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