full moon fever

Posted on | November 21, 2008 | No Comments

there is this effete loneliness,
which grows around me,
insipid.yet intractable.
swirling around my feet, wafting up my waist,
and curling above,to my eyes…
no wind clears this mist,
a white unconsciousness,
which revolves around my feet,
like a homemade snowstorm…

i look at meaningless pictures,
each worth less than a word,
images as senseless as the endless cigarettes i smoke,
as violent as sugarless black coffee,
in my grey desolation,
i watch the silence explode in a melange of colours,
silent noise,a violent movie played on mute,
a snowstorm…outside the glass window…

i am going mad,aint i?
writing senseless words in the before morning dark,
blinded by own flashing loneliness,
accentuated by all the laughs i laughed this evening,
enough for a month,for a lifetime,
makebelieve happiness,
till that girl recognised it for what it was,
fake caught in spotlights,
stark,harsh reality,
after which time slows down,
just a bit,
like the languorous dripping of thick coffee,
which is strong enough to keep me awake all night,and the rest of my life…
real sadness and mock laughter,both mine;
and incomplete poems,
lingering,swirling,mocking,
brilliant,eyehurting,shining white blizzards of failure…

Current Music: some ennio morricone soundtrack (i think the good,the bad and the ugly)

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