beloved

Posted on | October 29, 2009 | No Comments

i feel like a caged bird,
trying to look out the window,
seeking,something i have a lost,
a fragment of the sky i just finished painting-
my hands are still a wet blue and white,
the clouds dripping from my fingers,
in a dry,half-imaginary rain.

i sometimes imagine freedom-
substitute skies above me,
and ersatz ground on which i stand,
fake spray from a make-believe sea-
drizzling salty on my lips,
and a lying wind,running fingers through my hair.

she is my mistress,
this leprechaun wind,
staying with me,in my mind,always,
she never goes away-not in the mornings,
whe wakes me up,
caressing my face with her imaginary fingers,
running lines on my lips,
sometimes,falling asleep in my embrace,
as i watch her face.

we converse,in half-syllables,
sometimes,communicating in silences,
i understand,her laughter,
and those shy half-smiles,
sometimes-i take her hand in mine,
just to reassure myself (in imagination),
that she is there,
and her eyes comfort me,
knowing what i mean.

she will never go away,
leaving me alone,
will be there through my silences,
never impatient,
comforting me,carrying me-
through this grief of being alive,
she will never let me go,
in my mind-
she will always be my lover.

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