Rings of Smoke

Where shall the word be found, where will the word | Resound? Not here, there is not enough silence

notes to myself-1. re. cricket

Posted on | November 2, 2009 | 4 Comments

1.    There will be times, during cricket coverage on TV, when you will fume at the shoddy signal quality, displays from all angles except the relevant one, moronic crowd behavior, random commentary and all sort of blah-de-blah things which are de-rigueur whenever cricket is broadcast on TV in India. Stop fuming, and try to ignore such petty things. Life will be happier.
2.    No. Cricket commentators cannot talk like normal people. They probably are not normal people too. They will spout B-movie screenplay-ish sentences like “at any stage of the game, if there is a six to be hit, he will hit it” or “some of their bats look like they have been hospitalized”. Accept it, and learn to live with it, because they are paid to talk like that. They probably berate their sons saying, “if at any stage of college, there is an exam to be flunked, you will flunk it”.
3.    Accept the fact that even experienced cricket commentators will turn up gems like “this bat looks brand new, just out of its wrappers” whenever they see a pockmark-less bat in the hands of a top-notch professional player in the middle of a high-voltage contest. Of course, the fact that I have yet to meet a professional cricketer who will take a brand-new, just of the wrappers bat to any contest of any significance, bears no consequence. After all, a fact recognized by even amateur cricketers has no significance what so ever.
4.    I, for one, cannot see what astounding feat of umpiring it is to NOT give a batsman out to a ball which pitched an inch outside off and was a yard outside of off at point of impact. But, of course, the talking heads probably took employee engagement courses and have to say it was remarkable umpiring. In my book, it would have been remarkable (remarkably stupid) had it been given out. Nevertheless, in an age where incompetence is celebrated, anything near normal has to be applauded. Good decision.
5.    Learn to live with the fact that even though all international matches of any significance are only played with either white or red balls, the seats around the sight-screens in any stadium you see, just have to be either white or red. I guess other colors like blue or yellow or green would degrade cricket, and black, of course, is technically not a color at all.

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Category: miscellaneous, ramblings

Comments

4 Responses to “notes to myself-1. re. cricket”

  1. mithun
    November 2nd, 2009 @ 8:23 pm

    sale jab se tu MT confirm hua hai dan dana dan tere post aa rahe hai :D

  2. soni
    November 3rd, 2009 @ 10:20 pm

    Ahem…!!! i had so many grudges against the commentators !! and you finished too early.
    probably you missed the hindi commentary in the 3rd one day when ” ricky aur ponting dono hi ballebaaj gatishil daud lagate hai vikato ke beech mein”

  3. Sandeep
    November 4th, 2009 @ 7:51 am

    @soni

    there are so many others-perhaps for another post :)

    c.f.: he is in this team, dougie bollinger, because of he has a great heart! you ask any of the new south wales guys and they just love having him around!!

    of course, the fact that he has been bowling great and his superb fielding had no bearing on his selection, after all great hearts are everything!

  4. Sandeep
    November 4th, 2009 @ 7:51 am

    @mithun

    nothing like that,yaar…relate it to a long long weekend

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